Relena hadn’t even noticed that Viserys had left them, for as soon as the announcement was done and most lords had congratulated her, she had got involved in a conversation with the members of her small council. Once she did notice that the father to be had left, the young queen excused herself. Apparently this pregnancy had more than just one perk, for now people just smiled and nodded when she declared that she had to withdraw to her chambers. As soon as the raven haired girl opened the door to the chamber she began talking: “Where have you…”, but she stopped as soon as she heard her husband’s voice.
“Yes, I wanted to suggest the same to you this evening at supper…”, Relena mumbled as she studied Viserys’s face. “What were you doing in here?”, she questioned. There was a frown upon her forehead and her dark eyebrows were slightly raised as she looked at the silver haired man, her gaze focusing upon his eyes. “This is a blessed day, we have fulfilled our duty, we are going to give the people an heir, our marriage was successful, therefore I hope that the redness around your eyes comes from tears of joy, after all you are going to be father, doesn’t that make you happy?.”
It had been a small test, to see if she’d say no. She’d tell him to stay in their bed chamber. An he couldn’t figure out if she had passed or failed. Failed because he wanted a different answer or passed because he expected exactly the answer she gave him. Viserys gave a breathy sigh as he exhaled, meeting her gaze with his violet eyes. Doesn’t that make you happy? Her words echoed in his mind as he clenched a hand around the sheets. “Yes. It makes me happy. Beyond any expression of the word. You make me happy. Despite everything. Despite how we came to be here, despite your revulsion of me and indifference…” He could feel the old familiar feeling of rage beginning to build and he was trying hard to hold it back.
“When I first laid eyes on you I wanted nothing more than to pull you from the throne. To do whatever it took. Dany and Eddard saw another way and it worked. I hated the idea of courting you but I pushed past it, tried to accept that it would be the best and peaceful way. I only cared about one thing. That throne. But now…Now I care about two things. You, Relena and our child. I fought the growing feelings for you for months. But before I knew it I was waking every morning, happy to see your face at meals, to be around you. And when I saw you walking down in your wedding gown…”
He paused for a moment as he regained his composure “You are beautiful, but there was something almost magical about that day. When I looked at you everything else blurred.” It was than he remembered their wedding night and his fond smile turned sour and the rage came trickling out.
“I wanted to please you, to make everything as pleasant as I could for you and-and-it felt like at moments there was just a corpse instead of a person and every night that followed, it was agony wanting to pull you close to me and go to sleep, feel that bond and connection…Relena, I wanted a marriage for myself that was kind and warm. Not like my parents; abusive and forceful. Not horrid. I want–ed to hold you and wake up to seeing your face and kissing you awake. I know it’s idealistic and foolish, especially coming from me…But after getting to know you, loving you, my perspective changed. I am happy we are going to be parents, bringing in a child to the world, to raise and see grow. But I also want you to be happy because you make me happy. Duty and kingdom aside.“
He couldn’t tare his gaze away from her as he spoke, his words spilling fourth before he raised himself from the bed and tried to close off the distance between them before he reached over her to grab one of his things from the vanity. “I’ll move my things, my servant will see to it that it’s all gone by the end of today.” He informed her as he started to pull away from the proximity.
Goldnwulf 