I can’t imagine they had a ton of devotees and worshippers when their culture was alive and kicking (based on what I know, which isn’t a lot). Besides, free food. And, aren’t they historically not super talkative and affectionate? You can’t necessarily take their silence as ignoring you
it’s their silence with me and volume with others that makes me wonder what is wrong with me, especially when I made sure to keep up constant communication options opened on my end. After a while of constantly being met with nothing more than a shrug when I did get an answer it’s worn on me.
I have the same problem. By and large my gods don’t say much to me, and I have a godphone (it’s not that great, but I have one). They haven’t rejected me, so I stick around. They help unexpectedly and I appreciate that. I have trouble with the silence too, but I understand that sometimes they just don’t talk a lot. It doesn’t mean I’ve been rejected or that they don’t want me around. Not to mention they keep chasing other gods off sooooo. It’s hard to get over, but I think of it like this: when my depression is getting the better of me, I have this issue of thinking I’m ruining everything in my relationship and that this will never work and I should break up (both god relations and with my fiance). I have to work extremely hard (omg it’s so fucking hard) to remind myself that it’s sick brain talk, and that it’s not true. Oftentimes the gods and my fiance can’t really say anything to me. What will they say? The same they always do, you’re fine, we’re fine, I care. They don’t really understand, and it can make it difficult for them to help and comfort. Doesn’t mean they don’t care.
idk if it matters or not, but even though my gods chose me, I still don’t always hear from them very often. They both go through long periods of not showing up, not saying anything, etc. Hell, I can count on one hand (or close to it) how many times I’ve talked with them in the past year and a half (albeit specific circumstances are part of the reason why).
Sometimes no news is good news. Sometimes the gods are saying things and we don’t hear it (this is esp true for those of us under a lot of stress and those of us with mental illness, imo). Sometimes the gods don’t know what to say. Sometimes they’re trying to say stuff, and it’s not working, etc.
This is why I tend to push people to find their own personal reasons to continue to venerate gods. Or to fall in love with the religion first, and have the gods be an added bonus. I sometimes feel that practicing a religion simply because you’ve got a fondness for a particular deity can lead into problems if said deity disappears for a while, and/or if a god doesn’t ever show up to “claim you” to begin with. It makes it harder to find the motivation to continue if said motivation is pinned on one (or a few) entity.
F’ex, if the only reason I practiced Kemeticism was because I liked Set, I’m not sure what that would have meant for me a few years back when he kicked me in the teeth like he did. I probably would have lost the motivation to stick around, because it was all centered around him. But since I like Kemeticism as a religious structure with o without gods, it was less of an issue about religious practice (as in, should I stay Kemetic now that I hate Set), and became more of an issue of me and my deity having a specific problem (I am mad at Set, but would stay Kemetic even if I decided to no longer venerate him).
Obvs, this is only partially relevant to HH, but I had thoughts and felt like hanging them somewhere so here I am. I guess what I’m saying is that a lack of communication doesn’t necessarily mean that someone doesn’t like you or want you around. There are lots of people I like a lot, but don’t talk to regularly or as much as I feel I probably should be. There can be lots of reasons why communication isn’t happening, and sometimes the reasoning has nothing to do with the devotee in question.
And since the communication isn’t always there, for a variety of reasons, coming up with a personal reason to want to do the Thing, even when circumstances aren’t ideal, can sometimes help to keep you going when shit hits fan or a fallow period sets in. Obvs, it’s not for everyone, but it’s something to consider, I guess.
That being said, if you’re not getting a whole lot out of the relationship, there technically is nothing wrong with parting ways- even if for a little while. Sometimes we have to back away from something entirely in order to see what it does for us, for our lives, to our mental health, etc. It’s part of why i’m taking such a huge break from social media–I want to see how it truly effects me, and I can’t do that if I don’t make a somewhat extreme decision and examine the results. So I mean, if you’re not sure, maybe take a break for a bit and see what happens. It may help to clarify why you keep going, even though you feel like there isn’t a lot of purpose/point behind it. Or you may find that it really wasn’t doing anything for you. Either revelation may be helpful for figuring out what to do moving forward.
idk. I’m rambling now.
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Goldnwulf 