all i need is a lucifer christmas episode
-luci: “aaaaaand for some reason we’re getting presents for my piece of shit father’s other son’s birthday”
-chloe and mazikeen hold a christmas party to celebrate their new flat and the whole cast gets up to shenanigans™
-trixie teaches maze how to bake christmas cookies. they end up somehow setting them on fire even though they’re the ready-to-bake kind that you just cut out and put on a cooking sheet, and maze’s gingerbread men have all succumbed to various injuries involving red frosting and missing limbs, but everyone agrees that they’re pretty good. (they’re really not, completely charred around the edges, but maze wants trixie to think she’s a master baker and will threaten at knifepoint anybody saying otherwise)
-for ironic purposes, the immortal!fam ends up making and sending out christmas cards. they’re all wearing tacky red and green sweaters. charlotte has her hands on her sons’ shoulders and is grinning maniacally, lucifer is hunched over, head in hands, amenadiel only got roped into this because of a veritable gallon of spiked eggnog and is as such chortling heartily at luci’s angst. the card reads: “happy holidays from the morningstars – y’all are going to hell”
-chloe has a surprisingly good singing voice, especially when wasted (partially due to trickery on the tribe’s part involving the aforementioned spiked eggnog.) somebody manages to get her rendition of “santa baby” on video and uploaded to youtube, its gotten five thousand views in the past two days and everyone’s going batshit insane
-ella gets way too excited about ye olde annual christmas tv specials. she sings along to each one with grandeur and lets just say that her singing voice isnt the most in tune but shes too adorable for anybody to criticize
-everybody gets ironically appropriate presents and sings christmas carols and nobody is plagued by family drama death angst or suffering. these beautiful people just get to be Happy for five seconds
Published
Goldnwulf 