lordsnow:

gendrie:

ok let me get this out of my system: 

nobody is saying arya was locked in a tower or hated by every person who resided in winterfell or whatever the fuck this fandom is on about now.  obviously, jon cherished arya but he was an outsider too. and the smallfolk adored her but they dont make the rules. even ned, who indulged her to a degree, expected her to conform. but the women in arya’s life, who mocked belittled and disrespected everything she did, had the biggest impact. they shaped her view of a woman’s role in westeros. this effects her entire outlook on life. as a highborn girl being a lady is a crucial part of arya’s identity. but its one she feels she is unworthy of. she can’t sew because her hands are like a blacksmiths. she should marry hodor because they’re both stupid and ugly. she should be like sansa so thats she has value. they literally made her feel like she didnt belong in her own life. and surprise! this plays an integral part in aryas story. her arc is about identity and belonging as she shapeshifts into numerous personas and lives on the run. she doubts her own place in the world. she doesnt know if her own mother would want her back. and even in adwd we see arya reflect on the names she was called during her life at winterfell a she tries to forget that life ever existed because she was stupid and ugly. she has a right to these insecurities and its not fair to disregard them. her relationship with femininity, identity and her role in society has been a factor since her first chapter and will continue to be until the very end 

#one of the most jarring and heartbreaking things in arya’s chapter i think is in AGoT when Ned tells Arya that she reminds him of Lyanna   #and the FIRST THING to come out of her mouth was ‘lyanna was beautiful’ and her immediate thought afterward was ‘that was not a thing that  #was ever said about Arya’   #I mean Ned tells her that his sister was wolf blooded and would have carried a sword if she was allowed to and Arya doesn’t think to herself   #‘i can see why i would remind him of her because I’m like that too’   #she immediately thinks of Lyanna’s beauty and how Arya believes that she has none herself without Ned even mentioning Lyanna’s beauty   #like…… come on you guys   #Arya’s relationship with beauty and femininity is so apparent and it did not come from nowhere   #the people around her made her feel ugly and insufficient and yes those people were her family but that doesn’t make it okay (via @lyannas)